The complex conversations needed to prepare heirs for wealth transition are often stalled because family members are afraid of being judged or having their opinions interpreted critically. But delaying those conversations can lead to divisiveness, solidified opposing positions and increased friction in relationships. We suggest trying a new perspective: "Be curious, not critical." Ask more questions from a place of curiosity to understand the other person's intentions. Ask open-ended questions such as these: "What do you see is your role in wealth transition?" "What are your expectations of me?" "How do you see this wealth transitioning well to your family?" This allows the conversations to happen on a more even playing field, in a mood of mutual respect, which will give way to more possibilities vs. family members defending their positions. We encourage our family members to hit the pause button on their reactivity, take a breath and be "curious, not critical" with the people they care most about in their lives. Call us if you would like to learn more about putting relationships first and inviting more productive conversations.